I find it helps to write about things – some people find it good to talk, I would rather put it down on paper.

The world of gestational diabetes is very new to me, well if I am quite honest, I don’t know an awful lot about diabetes full stop. There are two types, one will always need treatment and one can be helped but lifetsyle and diet changes – but I know little else.

Year Covid has been an interesting one all round, highs and lows for everybody. Thankfully we ended 2020 on a high when we found out I was pregnant.

Now because I am a lady(ish) of a certain age, and build, I have had ALOT of tests. Again, all new to me, I avoid the doctors and hospitals as much as possible! I am nearly 40, I will be 40 when baby is born – and my BMI is 30.1 – as I have said before I am built for strength not speed. This BMI is something I have always questioned – I remember having a check up and as part of it being weighed – the nurse said that I was half a stone too heavy for my height – this did not resonate with me – I was my target weight for the tug of war team, and training three times a week, eating very tidily – so I struggle with the BMI chart – a good guide but averages don’t work for me…I mean who aims to be average?

Because my BMI is over 30, one of the tests were for blood sugars, and it came back to show that it was likely I had gestational diabetes – I was rather shocked, but started reading more about it and had the appointment with the nutritionist and other nurses, got referred to consultant let care rather than midwife led – and I did as I should for a few weeks.

I received some new kit in the post to test my sugars four times a day – and started keeping a note of which foods I was eating when etc to try and understand the patterns better. As part of the information pack I received, was the eat well guide wheel that government have issued, where they show how much protein, carbs and veg you should eat to have a balanced diet. Now I pride myself on a balanced diet – but know where my faults lie – and that is portion size, cake, and wine. Wine has obviously been eradicated from my diet (but will be making a comeback before Christmas, I have two boxes I’d ordered for 2020 Christmas!), and cake has been reduced, if I need a snack now I have cheese and crackers or something. My point is that my general meal time diet is good – I eat three times a day, and have a balance of protein, carbs and veg or salad items – so I was genuinely disappointed with my body not being able to handle this as a good part of my pregnancy.

I have come across the eat well guide in the past, and again – it doesn’t resonate with me – if I ate that volume of carbs, I would be the size of a house (and my sugars would be very high) – the protein options are very limited, no red meat on there – although they mention mince but don’t state which species mince – and beans, lentils are up there higher on the scale. My diet consists of high quality protein, we are fortunate that lean red meat is something we have access to, very easily. I am disheartened that ‘processed and red meats’ are put into the same category. I can understand the processed part, as so many ingredients may have been added (this is why you will see me reading ingredients if you pass my in a shop) but red meat is good for you as part of a balanced diet. I eat a decent amount of red meat – partly because I am trying to support an industry I not only work in, but I believe in, and partly because it is so good for you!

One test result that came out to be good – much higher than average (this is what we should all aim for!) was my iron level, and the nurses are surprised as apparently most ladies need iron supplements – don’t worry – I told them it is all about the healthy red meat I eat!

There is a level of stubbornness to my personality – sometimes a good thing, sometimes not. Link this quality with principles I try hard to maintain and you can have a person who will be a challenge in some form – I like to think it is a passionate impression I give, but not always sure that comes across.

For a good few weeks I resisted any treatment for the GD, I believe nature is very clever and that your body reacts in ways that work for it – not against it. I believe how we eat impacts our health – so this is why I have been disappointed, I cannot control GD without treatment. I feel as though I am failing myself and the baby. One nurse suggested to me that it is likely I will be diabetic after I give birth – to me that was a concern she didn’t need to give me, and is only a possibility so why worry me now?

I now have to take metformin tablets to balance my sugars, which seems to be helping it all settle, but my body does not like bread – even homemade seeded brown bread has been sending the sugars up. lean meat is good, eggs are good but even takeaway chips and ice cream didn’t impact the sugars…..which I am sure aren’t a healthy choice!

What I have noticed I do now is work with the testing – so I know I test first thing in the morning (but these levels have been fine all along really) then after each meal – so I eat the right meal, for example scrambled eggs, get a low reading after breakfast, I then get hungry mid morning and eat a snack – which I have discovered can be anything as there is no sugar reading until after lunch. This is not a good approach really – nut I am rebelling (yes that streak is still there aged 39) and I can get away with it. I am not proud of this behaviour but I am keeping the hospital happy, and me. When I actually think about it though, this isn’t how I want to be eating for my baby, so I try to eat the porridge – which lasts me all morning, but spikes my sugar – and we eat rice more than mash but I am maintaining my meat content.

I enjoy food, I read about it, I consider what I consume and because I work in the food industry I have a level of understanding of food labelling and guidance. Over the past few months though I have been very confused by the information I have been given – it is not easy to understand.

As an agricultural industry we criticise people who don’t understand labelling – but now I feel that is unfair – it really is a minefield, and depending on what you read and what guidance or information you are given – if you don’t have previous knowledge, you are likely to believe that – I know I would! If you top this with budgeting then it really can be quite difficult.

I am quite the fan of BBC 1 Call the Midwife programme – so was interested to see series 10 episode 3 featuring what seems to be the initial discoveries of gestational diabetes – a lady was suspected to have it (and has a character as stubborn as me) and ended up with a 13 pound baby!

The risk of GD is a large baby that is difficult to deliver, so can cause problems for baby, and for Mam – which you want to avoid of course. I am becoming less stubborn (well, on this) because I am starting to understand that it isn’t my fault – and I am focusing on lean meat, fish, vegetables, fruit, rice and some pasta as my diet – and as due date draws closer, I realise it is a short time I have to make sure this is right.

The next measurement I have is a growth scan at the end of May, so I am interested to see what baby measurements are and growth is, and what impact the medication and the diet is having. In one of my earlier appointments I asked what the expected daily live weight gain was – apparently we don’t measure unborn babies in the same way we measure lambs, calves and piglets….wps!

Please understand that I am incredibly grateful for people who are caring for me in the NHS – because they are brilliant at what they do, I am more accepting of the GD diagnosis and am hoping it will go once baby arrives. I do question things though, I cannot help it, whether it is my nature, or training from work positions – I do it for many different things!

I don’t deny I am still learning, and trying to get my head round all this – but in reality you don’t have that long to do so – I am trying to eat well (but not necessarily as per the eat well guide) and trying to keep a note of how to budget these meals well too, and feed a husband who doesn’t have GD and enjoys his carbs with his meals.

If any of you have experience of GD, or guidance you would like to share – I am all ears – a few months to go and still trying to get it right!